When I’m old and gray and reflecting back, I know I’ll say training for and running my first marathon was a pivotal point in my life.
I’d wanted to run a marathon since I was 17 yrs old. I’d imagined the glory of it all a million times. Every 2-3 miles around the track at the University gym I’d think, “maybe, one day.”
I was never the athlete I really wanted to be—or inside thought I was capable of. As I got older, running felt like my redemption.
I starved myself & treated my body badly for so long, I didn’t think I’d ever be strong enough to last for 26.2 miles. Compounding my eating disorder was alcoholism. I figured I’d always be hungover on weekend mornings, so long runs were a long shot.
Then, almost all of the sudden it seemed I was 34 (and 9 years sober). In 18wks of training, I ran 72 times and covered 438 miles. I’d say I cried on about 68 of those 72 runs. Whether it was a 5 miler or the big 20, somewhere, I’d have a moment where I’d go, “Holy shit, this is it, you’re doing it. You’re really gonna do this.”
I believed running a marathon wasn’t for me, that it was a dream that wouldn’t be realized. It was a feat for “real” athletes—for people with more strength and fortitude than I was capable of.
I believed that I could not, and then, I did.
Goddamn the whole world looked different after I crossed that finish line.
For the first time in my life, I truly believed that I could do anything—that no dream was too big or far away. I felt sure that the visions in my heart were true–put there not to taunt me, but to push me forward into a life even beyond my vivid imagination.
To believe you can’t, and then to do–to break free of the limiting ideas we bind ourselves up with–this is something I’d like everyone to experience.
Movement can be one of our biggest teachers. Connecting to our self and building communication between our body, mind, and spirit, can set us on a path to real joy and freedom. It’s why I want to work with athletes and athlete-minded people. I’d like to help you discover your full potential—on the field and off. Remember, “athlete” is a broad term. You don’t need the body of a god, to have the heart of a champion.
You’ll get yourself over whatever finish line you’re after–the marathon, the career change, the restored sense of self. But first, let me help you to the starting line. I know from experience, it can be the toughest threshold to pass.
photo: hudson hintze